Encounters with Icons

We have been without broadband for a while - it's been an ongoing battle which I won't go into simply because i'll just get angry and turn green. This has meant that Gruff and I have had to resort to buying over-priced drinks at our local coffe shop in exchange for "free" wifi - bah! When I was posting the other evening about the chaos of the flat - a crusty looking bloke sitting next to me asked for help, or rather demanded it. The encounter went something like this;

Shifty bloke: (tetchily) Excuse me! Why is my internet not working? Subtext: you look like geeky technophile seeing as it's a Saturday evening and you're on the internet which obviously means you're devoid of a social life

Me: You need the IP address (trying my best to be helpful but taken aback by this man's brusqueness)

SB: I have it here (expectantly waving a scrap of paper in my face)

Me: Sorry, I'm not a Mac user - I wouldn't know what to do. Subtext: It's your bloody computer, how the hell should I know why it's not working? Don't own a computer if you can't operate it Bozo!

SB: (stares at me aghast at my lack of co-operation)

Me: You could ask the guys behind the counter - they're quite helpful. Leave me be to get on with my blogging, loser!

Shifty bloke saunters off and Gruff whispers in my ear that he thinks the bloke's 'someone famous'. Gruff has a quick look on wikipedia and it's only Kevin Rowland who sang 'Come on Eileen' which was an anthem in my teenage years. Holy moly!!! My teenage self would never have thought I'd ever in a million years ever get to be sitting NEXT TO him let alone refuse to help him out with his little computer issue. Imagine!! If it'd been co-operative and sorted him out, he'd be forever grateful and I would have made a little difference in an icon's life!! Sigh.... I really should work on my celebrity spotting so that I can coolly ignore them instead of being rudely oblivious. Have spotted Tracey Emin and Gilbert & George whilst mooching about this hood but have always been too polite to stare. Except for Pete Docherty whom I usually scowl at as he's often just in my way.